Denial And Grief – And How You Can Get Through The Pain

There are various stages of the grieving process that you naturally go through to adjust to a life without your loved one. The void that you feel is entirely natural and normal. However, you face a new reality, a reality which you can't take for granted Denial as a Coping MechanismOne of the stages of grief is known as the stage of denial. Although the different stages of grieving do not happen in a particular order, denial is typically the initial response and thus the first stage of the process.

When faced with an overwhelming amount of emotion, it is easier to deny the cause of the emotion than to deal with reality. For example, it is easier to deny that someone you love has passed on and not have to deal with the flood of emotions than to face the reality of the situation head-on.

None of us wants to accept that someone we deeply love has died, and we cannot hold them, touch them, talk to them and relate to them. We find it difficult to believe we have lost an important person in our lives. We may have just spoken with this person the previous week or even the previous day.

Denial presents the bereaved with a mechanism with which to postpone, at least temporarily, facing up to the harsh new reality that faces you. Then, as you emerge out of denial, you can deal with coming to terms in a staggered manner with your feelings of grief and shock.

Denial is your natural defense response. The shield protects you emotionally from an onslaught that seems too much to bear.

We'd all rather avoid the journey of processing the death of a loved one. However, the sad truth is that death is a part of life.

Cremation diamonds can be designed while someone is still alive, allowing them to be included in how they want to be remembered.

As you slowly move out of denial, you will receive comfort from knowing that your loved one is still with you, ever-present in the jewelry you wear.

A remembrance diamond, which can be created before your loved one has passed away, lets you share the creation with them so they can see how beautiful it is.

Although denial is typically recognized as the first stage of the grieving process, you may find that the denial stage is repeated at various stages. However, this does not mean that you are not coping or have regressed, and it is pretty standard.

Isolation and Denial – a Word of Warning

As you deal with the denial and slowly start acknowledging and accepting your loss, it is normal to feel like isolating yourself from everyone.

You will probably wonder what the point of life is if it always ends in death. And if everyone you know is going to die and leave you to deal with the pain, then perhaps it's better to withdraw.

Isolation also means that you are not faced with answering questions about the situation and are not forced to confront the issue and apply your mind and emotions. It is easier to isolate and is a form of continued denial that the event ever happened - the proverbial ostrich burying its head in the sand syndrome.

It can be dangerous when a person uses denial and avoidance as a long-term solution to dealing with their grief. Remaining in a state of denial can prevent you from healing and moving ahead with life in a healthy way. Examples of this include:

• Self-medicating with alcohol, drugs, or food
• Minimizing your relationship with the person who has died and the pain you're feeling
• Pretending your loved one is away on a trip and will be coming back
• Refusing to talk about your loved one or even saying their name
• Speaking to your loved one in the present tense

How to Deal With Isolation and Denial

Firstly, it's essential to recognize that denial and even isolation are natural responses to the enormity of your experience.

As you go through the process, give yourself some slack. Recognize that you are coping in your unique way with a distressing situation. Pursue distractions that present themselves to you, and don't feel guilty about it.

Most importantly, make every effort not to bottle up any emotions that surface. If you need to cry, do so unashamedly and let it all out.

It would be best if you talked to friends and family. Now is the time to do so. Talking about how you feel and describing the loss and feelings of emptiness is cathartic. It will result in you sharing the load. A load shared is a load halved, and you will be amazed at how much this can help you cope.

It's possible to get stuck in the denial phase. Give yourself time, but it's essential to face the reality that your loved one is gone. So take an honest look at how you feel.

If you've been avoiding certain people, places, or situations, start reintroducing them into your life.

You could, for example, look at old photos, visit the gravesite or even sort through personal belongings left behind. Yet, through it all, allow others to see your tears and offer you comfort. Expressing your emotions is healthy and natural.

Creating a cremation diamond for someone while alive gives you confidence that the diamond is how they wanted it to look. Then, when you see and feel the diamond after they've passed away, an intimate sense of closeness will be present as you remember the times spent together.

A memorial diamond is an excellent conversation starter that enables you to engage with an emotionally charged subject.

Death as a subject is always torturous—both before and after the event. Talk with your loved ones about how you would like to honor their memory and how they would like to be remembered while still with you. Capture their memory forever.

Discussing death in advance can help the grieving process go more smoothly and allow healing to begin sooner.

Psychologists warn that shunning everyone will not bring you the peace you seek. Although isolation appears to be an excellent coping mechanism, it is not. A short period of isolation is quite normal, but if you find yourself remaining isolated, either make an effort to break out of it or seek professional help.

Help is at Hand. Take Advantage

There are various avenues you can pursue to help you deal with all elements of grief.

From grief groups to al-anon groups to special interest groups, there is something that will appeal to you and help you deal with death to get on with life.

Allow yourself time to adjust. Slowly, you will accept what has happened. Slowly you will reintegrate and start rebuilding your life.

Consider a memorial diamond whilst your loved ones are with you. It may just offer you that lifeline you need in a time of distress later in life.